Gender Ideology and the Christian

1 Timothy 4:1–2 (CSB) — 1 Now the Spirit explicitly says that in later times some will depart from the faith, paying attention to deceitful spirits and the teachings of demons, 2 through the hypocrisy of liars whose consciences are seared.

Ephesians 4:15 (CSB) — 15 But speaking the truth in love, let us grow in every way into him who is the head—Christ.

1 Peter 3:15–16 (CSB) — 15 but in your hearts regard Christ the Lord as holy, ready at any time to give a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you. 16 Yet do this with gentleness and reverence, keeping a clear conscience, so that when you are accused, those who disparage your good conduct in Christ will be put to shame.

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking through how I would respond to something like this because my heart’s one ambition is to faithfully follow Jesus, which is very difficult to do in issues that are as contentious as gender-ideology as become. So, I’ve listened carefully to several different Christian perspectives because I wanted to let those who are wise among us speak first (Job 32:4), and it seems to me that the Christian response comes down to three broad approaches: 1) some draw on Biblical principles of “honor” and “respect” to say that Christians should defer to people’s preferences in public while seeking opportunities to share their views in private where they can be most effective; 2) some draw on Biblical principles of “truth” and “courage” to say that Christians should confront these lies in public wherever they encounter them so that these lies can’t take hold; and 3) some seem to suggest we stick our head in the sand and just “go with our gut” when the moment arises. So I want to share my thoughts in the hope that it might help others think through these challenges for themselves. But please also let me know how you’re approaching this issue in the comments below!

First, I think we have to discern the spiritual realities present in these challenges: Paul writes above to Timothy that in the end there will be demonic deceptions and doctrines that will sear peoples consciences, meaning that liars will use deception and error to destroy the moral sensitivity of the human soul. Like the old fairy-tale, “the Emperor Has No Clothes“, we’re being asked to acknowledge and validate lies in everyday life, which sears our conscience so that we are no longer intellectually offended by what should intellectually offend us! I’m not talking about an emotional offense; if someone asks me if I’m pregnant, I’m not insulted because I know they’re not trying to be derogatory towards my masculinity. But I am intellectually offended because they’re asking me to indulge a lie. And it’s impossible for someone who rejects the fundamental truths of reality to walk by faith after Jesus. This is why Paul warns that “the coming of the lawless one is based on Satan’s working, with every kind of miracle, both signs and wonders serving the lie, and with every wicked deception among those who are perishing… because they did not accept the love of the truth and so be saved.” (2 Thessalonians 2:9–10, CSB). The rejection of truth is the spiritual reality of the challenge that we’re facing, and it’s dividing us against one another, raising strife, and dehumanizing people towards one another.

So, here are some of my convictions, but again, I want to invite you to share how you’re working through this in the comments below.

First, I begin with the baselines of Christian social ethics: “honor everyone” (1 Peter 3:17), “love your neighbor” (Mark 12:31), “as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18). I’m going to humanize everyone I encounter and elevate their personal dignity as much as I can. I’m going to treat them with the kind of love I would like to be shown. And, for my share in the relationship, I’m going to live peacefully with everyone.

I think it will be helpful here to illustrate this point: the Starbucks I frequent has one full-time barista who seems to be a cross-dresser, and, because I’m a people-watcher, I’ve watched how others interact with him. Most people seem nervous around him, I think because they are afraid to say the wrong thing to him since they’re not sure the difference between cross-dressers and transgenders. So, to make life simpler, it seems like most people simply minimize their interaction with him altogether, which I don’t think is right. So, as is my custom with everyone, I’ve made it my purpose for us to humanize one another: I have asked for drink recommendations that are compatible with the keto-diet, and followed up with appreciation for their recommendation after I finish the drink. I have paid attention to how they prepare drinks and applauded how good they are at preparing multiple drinks at the same time. I ask how their shift is going before I order my drink. Whatever I can do to be present around this person and make them feel seen.

My purpose is for us to genuinely recognize each other as fellow human beings, rather than as enemies, which begins on my part by doing things that recognize their essential dignity as divine image-bearers.

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Now this endeavor is made difficult because he sees my Bible and hears the conversations I have with others at Starbucks. So he knows that I’m a Christian. And, because of how Christians have fought the culture-war in this country, that means to him I’m his enemy, and it’s evident by how he treats me that he feels this way about me. But, that just means that I must show him that it’s possible to believe someone to be wrong and still dignify their humanity and value your relationship with them.

However, this alone does not answer the dilemma we’re talking about; it merely provides an anchor for how we treat should treat others. The principle for our answer comes from what Paul and Peter wrote above: “Speak the truth in love, being ready at all times to give a gentle and reverent answer for the hope that is in us.”

We are being left with almost no neutral ground because of how aggressive this ideology has become, which means that Christians will be forced to engage these demonic deceptions in spheres where they would otherwise rather not. I do not want to address gender-ideology at the doctor’s office with a nurse or administrator who is just asking check-in questions from a pre-filled list, but, the only alternative is to acknowledge and validate these lies in our everyday life. Our society is systematically constructing and imposing a worldview that is demonically opposed to the foundational truths of life, which places Christians at an impasse. We simply cannot ignore this or act like this is no big deal.

So, if I’m checking into a doctor’s office and someone asks me if I’m pregnant, I will not answer simply “no“, because that would validate their lie as it appears to recognize the validity of their question. Instead, my answer will be “I’m a man“, which forces them to recognize the truth of reality. If they push it further and tell me that they need a “yes or no, because men can be pregnant too”, then I will answer “I have testicles, not ovarie; do you think I’m pregnant?” And I will use spiritual discernment for the moment: if we’re in a private exam room where I have time to speak freely, I will speak to their moral obligation to uphold the foundational truths of life, and challenge them that if they validate questions like these, they are personally responsible for undermining the truth by which we understand our world. I may speak to them about how the doctors in Germany accepted fraudulent scientific narratives about the superiority of the Aryan race, and were, therefore, responsible for their share in deconstructing fundamental truths that would have prevented those destructive lies from taking hold had they stood up against them in the first place. I may also warn them that validating these lies will discredit the medical profession, causing people to distrust doctors, which can have destructive consequences. My purpose will be to emphasize both the fragility and necessity of life’s fundamental truths. I will tell them that because it’s not true that human males can be pregnant, it’s both wrong and intellectually offensive to ask men if they are pregnant. This is the equivalent of asking women if they have blood in their sperm, or if it hurts when they ejaculate. These are not valid medical questions to ask women. And neither is asking men if they are pregnant a valid (or truthful) medical question.

But here I also want to speak to my fellow Christians, some of whom serve in professions where they are being asked to validate these lies: there’s a fundamental difference between behaving peacefully towards others and validating error or participating in sin. While sometimes Christians can pick the ground we choose to take stands, we cannot concede ground when it comes to validating lies against the fundamental truths of reality or participating in sin. Our testimony cannot be that we accept transgender views on gender-identity as one valid perspective among others. We cannot compromise for either political or personal gain. If you are being required to validate these lies, then Jesus is calling on you to take a stand and suffer on his behalf as his witnesses to truth! We cannot be afraid to suffer and be rejected because of these things.

“But David, aren’t you a pacifist?” One of the greatest misconceptions about pacifists is the idea that we are passive, when in-fact, because pacifists eschew the weapons of violence and coercive force, we must necessarily pick up the weapons of reason, truth, love, and forgiveness. Pacifists must actually be more outspoken than other militant worldviews precisely because we cannot take up coercive force. We must reason through truth and love to change people’s hearts and minds. We must appeal to peoples consciences rather than to their fear. So it is with our society, which is being held together by fraying threads, that the only way to avoid catastrophic and violent conflicts is for us to simultaneously dignify the humanity of our neighbors and defend the truth by which some shared understanding of this world can be found.

What this means is that I’m not out looking for ideological or tribal conflicts with others. I am intentional about peacefully dignifying and connecting with the people in my community. But I’m unwilling to deny the fundamental truths of reality, and I will refuse to validate systemic lies when they encroach upon neutral spaces in my daily life. My answer will be that I cannot honestly refer to a man as “her” because I’m a Christian who believes God created “men and women” in his image. But I will behave peacefully towards everyone so that any conflict on this matter only occurs by their initiative.

What do you think?

Sound off below!